I’m not what you would call “outdoorsy”, but I want to be. I’m an outdoorsman poser.
I’m in the first half of a vacation, and already I’ve postponed picking up dog poo, making a run to the dump, digging out part of a retaining wall, and having gravel delivered for our driveway.
I DID level part of an area out under our deck for a concrete patio, but it was hard, and I did not enjoy it.
We live in the mountains, and our house has amazing views all around. I wear outdoorsy clothes, and know things about camping, hunting, backpacking, construction, landscaping, building, botany, et al. I just don’t actually do any of them.
In about 5 minutes, I’m headed outside to work with my Dad. He also knows a ton about the above mentioned things. In fact, he is an expert in most of them. The difference is: He is an expert from experience, and I know about them from reading and watching.
I’m the kind of nerd that spends a few hours on Wikipedia reading about the history of dry-wall. But actually work with dry-wall? No, thank you.
I play video games. I read books. I like to write. I organize my iTunes. I really enjoy cleaning the house. I like to cook. I do my best to keep up on all DVR’d programs.
I do have big plans for outside. My dad has the inside scoop on a lot of free Boquet Canyon Stone. We’re gonna make a sweet patio and fire pit. We have an area for our orchard already mapped out. And the kids play area? How about a calisthenics yard, climbing rock, zip line, and whimsical garden?
Those ideas are all in the planning phase. By planning phase, I mean: They can be started and completed whenever I run out of video games, movies, and TV shows.
When our house was under construction, we lived in my parents house, next door. As a cost saving measure, we did a lot of things on our own. My wife and I painted the whole house.* I laid the stone for our fire-place. We tiled the down-stairs bathroom. We did all of the shopping for hard-ware, fixtures, etc. We sourced out the granite. I sealed the deck. We did all of the construction clean up. We installed beams.
I didn’t do any of that because I wanted to, though. I would be quite happy to shell out the bucks, and walk into a house made to my specs. I’ll admit, tiling the downstairs bathroom was kinda fun, but only in hindsight.
My lack of enjoyment doesn’t stop me from bragging, though. We cant have houseguests without me showing them all of the things I did personally on the house.
“Oh, the fireplace? Yeah, I did that.”
“You like the tile in the bathroom? Heather and I did it. It was easy.”
And camping? Well, I grew up doing that, and I think I’m done, thank you very much. We have a 3 year old a 3 week old. Its hard enough going to dinner or running errands. Packing everything up so we can live outside? No, thank you.
There is an interesting change on the wind though. With the new additions to the household, my sanctuary is slowly being taken away from me. Xbox sessions are now interrupted with
“Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. I want to watch Bolt. Daddy. Bolt. Bolt. Can I watch Bolt? Daddy. Look at me. This movie. Can I put it on? Daddy. You playing video games? Daddy. Bolt. Look. He has a lightning bolt. Can I watch it? Daddy?”
And even time on the computer is marked with
“Babe! You almost done? Liam’s hungry and Amalia took her clothes off and is running laps around the couch.”
I cant even stay up late and have those last few hours to myself any more. Liam eats around 11:30p, and I’m on Amalia duty first thing in the morning.
Working outside is starting to sound pretty sweet, actually.
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